Myriad of sad events

I don't like tomorrow and if I don't like it I wonder how much she must hate it.
Dear God, I'm not judging your will I am just stating facts so maybe I can begin to understand the reason behind all this. This week was supposed to be the week which I plan my birthday and everybody is super cite about it! Instead tragedy stroke and we ended  up on going to a memorial service tomorrow!When tragedy strikes like this, it pulls your head out of your butt and makes you realize how insignificant your usual sorrows are but it doesn't make them any less hurtful it just adds up to the pain! Last year around this time of the year I told someone that it hasn't been a good year for me and next year will definitely be a good year! I can't nag! Nothing bad happened to me and I had peace of mind for a change but generally it was not a good year! We witnessed death of three people under 22! Two I even didn't know and one I barely knew but they were still tragedies and I shed tears over them! Now we have a friend who has lost her mom and this time it's a close friend! I can'r wrap my head around these tragedies ! As i told Niousha today, my life has turned into a myriad of long periods of waiting for sad and hard things to pass and good things to come! She talked of inner happiness and I believe in that! I mean that fact that I get to support my friend tomorrow gives me inner joy but sometimes and once a year is not that much to ask, you need to scream happiness and not just feel it inside! I keep hoping for my admissions to come so I find something solid to be happy about but they are sure taking their time! So dear God, help us all to be patient and grateful cuz I do believe you have a grand plan for us....